Greg Gutfeld: President Biden Takes Vacation Amid ‘Historic Raid’ of Former President Trump’s Home


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Happy Thursday, everyone. What, what a great show we had. Brett Baier is here. Yeah, if I put in new batteries I think it would be Brett Baier or Teddy Ruxpin. Dagen McDowell is here. I know, because I can smell the crawfish in her purse.

While the country is reeling from a freak, historic attack on a former president’s mansion, our current president goes on vacation. Suppose they try parasailing or base jumping or, even more dangerous, take the stairs in a hotel. But they deserve a break. Because, as you know, he has done so much. First he put on his jacket. This is after he slow danced with it for 15 minutes. But that was the crowning achievement of his presidency so far, during which he did a solid boom boom in the bathroom of the press office. Well, near the press office bathroom. Sorry, Brett.

So after roughly four minutes of actual work with his hands busier than CNN producers on Bring Your Daughter to Work Day, Biden hopped on a plane. He flies in a plane and Dr. Not just with Jill, but with Joe, a famous pediatric neurosurgeon who discovered a cure for hemorrhoids when he accidentally sat on a stack of bingo chips. He invited his son Hunter to fly along. Hunter isn’t sure he really needs a plane to do that, but he prepares to leave with Joe. I think we have tape of the actual flight with Hunter.

DOJ asks court to unseal Mar-a-Lago raid warrant; AG Merrick Garland personally signed off on the Trump search

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Frankly we saw good behavior in Lolita Express. By the way, they are not members of the freeloading family who enjoy free trips on your dime. Pelosi’s son also accompanied her on a recent trip to Taiwan. You know, the trip that almost led to war. Although she and her husband got business deals there, she wants us all to believe it was just a coincidence.

As Hunter and Joe say, they head to China for authentic Kung Pao chicken. Nancy said her son was there as her escort, to which Hunter said, “That’s too kinky for me.” But I think she is trying to save face. What’s the point? No wonder though. She’s down to the last three she keeps in the fridge. Every time she reaches for a pint of chocolate Häagen-Doz, she looks back at herself.

President Joe Biden, center, returns the salute as he is joined by, from left, son Hunter Biden, grandson Beau Biden, first lady Jill Biden, Fuzzy and daughter-in-law Melissa Cohen. Stages of Air Force One.
(AP Photo/Susan Walsh)

But what a contrast to how Trump’s family was treated this week. Biden and Pelosi fly around, Trump’s house gets raided. Oh, sorry, did I say attack? How dare you say lockstep lemmings work from the same script.

House Republicans Blast Nancy Pelosi’s Taiwan Trip: ‘Photo Op Foreign Policy’

MSNBC: And I know Donald Trump is saying it’s an attack, but that’s an exaggeration.

CNN: Care should be taken not to adopt the word attack.

MSNBC: It was not an attack.

CNN: This is not an attack.

MSNBC: This is not an attack.

MSNBC: Trump talks about the attack on his home. No, man, there was no attack on your house.

MSNBC: Let’s be polite and call it a search and not an attack.

MSNBC: It was not an attack on his house. No doors were kicked in.

It’s amazing how similar they sound. So it wasn’t an attack because no doors were kicked in. Look, you know, I don’t think you need to kick in doors when you’re armed and the doors are already open for you, you butthead. forgive me Is he Butt-head or Beavis? I keep forgetting. Makes a lot of sense. And yes, it’s just a search, not a raid.

Following an FBI raid on former President Donald Trump's Mar-a-Lago home in New York City.

Following an FBI raid on former President Donald Trump’s Mar-a-Lago home in New York City.
(Felipe Ramales/Fox News Digital)

Just like an Easter egg hunt. Bachelorette Scavenger Hunt. It was early trick or treating, and they were just dressed as cops. So now the media cares about words after completely misusing the English language. He’s like Kevin Spacey in the Little League World Series. What are you whining about? A woman is no longer a woman, a recession is not a recession, now a raid is a search.

Trump attorney says FBI raid ‘shocking’: Trump was cooperating with feds, it’s an open-door policy

It’s funny watching the media try to play it down, when you find out it happened to one of their own, they blow up like Paul Pelosi’s air bag. I wonder what he is doing.

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He will leave shortly. But when it inevitably happens to Hunter and Joe we get to see how they react. He thinks he is above the law, as do most Democrats when Democrats are in power. But do they ever think ahead? They are not always in power. Of course the White House says Joe had no idea of ​​an attack on a living president. How awesome is that? I mean, I hide things like Joe’s car keys and ponytails. But it’s kind of a big deal. I wonder what is going on in Mr. Biden’s neighborhood.

SKIT

Meanwhile, all this time, Hillary is raising money for her own crimes. She’s selling merch behind the Mar-a-Lago attack, posting a picture of the new outfit on her Twitter account with the slogan, “But her emails.” A scandalous reference to using a private email server for official communications, she scoffed. She promoted the $30 hat on Monday, saying that every hat sold helps protect democracy, fight for our values, and hide the male pattern baldness of every feminist. “But her emails” are so cute, why does she have to stop there? Like “but her emails” I can see some more Clinton related swag. “But her blue dress,” “But his missing cigar,” “But she’s getting shellaced in 2016.” Finally, I know it takes up a lot of space in the hat, but it has to be done, “But Bill goes to the pedophile island and Epstein gets murdered.” I’m kidding. I’m your old bad bag.

Former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton's presidential campaign and the Democratic National Committee funded the anti-Trump dossier through law firm Perkins Coe.  (Photo by Cindy Ord/Getty Images)

Former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton’s presidential campaign and the Democratic National Committee funded the anti-Trump dossier through law firm Perkins Coe. (Photo by Cindy Ord/Getty Images)
((Photo by Cindy Ord/Getty Images))

In fact, these athletes have different rules than others. Say what you will about Trump. He was against the elite, Jay-Z or Dr. He is the most streetwise billionaire since Dre. And that’s why they hated him. Like Kilmead’s tapeworm, they couldn’t control him. So, we now hear that he has an FBI informant in his own home. It’s pretty gross, right?

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But what do you expect from the government that helped orchestrate the kidnapping of Michigan Governor Gretchen Whitmer? Gavin Newsom would have been so easy. You approach him with a van full of hair gel. But it’s crazy that you’re spying on a former president now, he’s not a Dem. But if you can’t invent crime, you can create it. The only problem is that it comes back to haunt you, right? If Republicans take back the House, they should attack Biden. I can picture it. FBI guys leaving with 15 boxes of oatmeal, denture cream and coloring books. But as Hunter Biden once said when he entered the bunny ranch, in the game, bitches.



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